Souvenirs

It's Spring time, and love is in the air.

At least love is alive and well in 1st grade at Katrina's school - which has made me think back to the ghosts of past loves and some of the ways that they have touched my present and directed me in who I have become today...


I was not an early dater.  I went to an all-girl high school, so meeting boys was a challenge both then, and in college - I just didn't know what I was supposed to do!  To boot, I was more than happy to be one-of-the boys, making me more popular in listening to their girl problems than actually being one of their girl problems.


Eventually love found me, and I wound my way through a few key male relationships that helped boost my self esteem, pushed me to try new things and introduced me to some of my core comforts almost two decades later.


Those who know me know that I am a huge Jimmy Buffett fan.  More his more recent, more introspective work, but a Parrot Head, none-the-less.  Jimmy recorded a little known song in the early 90's that sums up the journey that most of us have the privilege of taking as we transition from mate to mate, until we find our true soul-mate.  A song titled, "Souvenirs." 

Someone wants a piece of you, never let 'em pay.
What you do not give them, time takes anyway.
Had I known what love is worth, I could have saved the tears.
Might have come in handy, like souvenirs.
I wanted more than one until I found the one I wanted.
Her memories are ghosts now, though I'm still pretty haunted.
What we gave each other ain't exactly clear.
Probably comes under the heading of souvenirs.
Pieces, bits and pieces add up through the years.
I've collected a small fortune in souvenirs.

While my love (and need) for running and for Jimmy Buffett all summer and

every Friday are all souvenirs from previous loves and influences in my life,

my husband John is the hands-down provider of the souvenirs that I'll keep,  

treasure and revisit for the rest of my life. 

Our daughter, Katrina.

My appreciation for good waiters.

My ability to laugh at myself and handle stressful situations with confidence

and humor.

Most importantly, my belief that I do deserve better, to be treated well 

and that even at my worst, I am beautiful. 

It's so easy to look back and wonder what might have been.

But the reality for me is that life as I know it and live it now is so much 

more than I ever dreamed of, felt that I deserved, or expected to have

until a man I almost overlooked showed me that I was worthy,

special, and deserved the absolute best that life could give.

I hope that all of my friends and followers have collected and can look back

with smiles at your own personal stash of souvenirs.  And if you haven't in

awhile, go through your treasure box this weekend and appreciate

where you are and who you are - because everyone deserves their

own happy ending.

Peace